Cry, Heart, But Never Break by Glenn Ringtved

Cry, Heart, But Never Break by Glenn Ringtved, illustrated by Charlotte Pardi, translated from Danish by Robert Moulthrop
Enchanted Lion Books

Rating: 5 stars

A picture book about death?

That's not something you see everyday. But this exceptional, unique book by Glenn Ringtved is worth noting for the sad moment your child needs to say good-bye to a loved one in his or her life. There is magic within these pages, because the delivery of this message could easily have gone wrong had it not gone perfectly right.

Here's the story:

"In the far north" (love that this could take place anywhere), a beloved grandmother and her four grandchildren lived together for many years. Now, they had a visitor. The four children knew the visitor was Death. ("Not wanting to frighten the children, the visitor had left his scythe outside the door.")

The four knew about Death. They understood he had come for their grandmother, who lay ill in her bedroom. They tried to trick him into leaving without her, but Death sat patiently and quietly at the table while the children poured him cup after cup of coffee. Finally, Death "placed his bony hand over his cup to signal 'No more.'"

And here's where the tale goes from interesting to beautiful...

Death wanted the children to understand why he'd come, and so he said, "I would like to tell you a story." He told the children a story of two brothers named Sorrow and Grief who moved about in their gloomy lives until they came across two sisters named Joy and Delight, whose moods were always bright and sunny. Soon, Sorrow and Delight fell in love with each other, and Grief and Joy did the same. The four lived in their two houses on a hill until they were all old and gray, then they died on the same day because they could not live without each other.

Death said quietly, "Cry, Heart, but never break.
Let your tears of grief and sadness help begin new life."

"'It is the same with life and death,' Death said, 'What would life by worth if there were no death? Who would enjoy the sun if it never rained? Who would yearn for day if there were no night?'"

After one final good-bye, Death took the children's grandmother. And while their hearts will full of sorrow and grief, those same hearts did not break because they could remember the joy and delight of her life.

This was such a surprising, moving, beautiful book. Hopefully you will not need it in your life anytime soon, but...when Death inevitably and necessarily comes, perhaps it is a good one to read with your children.

Sally Goes to Heaven by Stephen Huneck

Sally Goes to Heaven by Stephen Huneck

Rating: 5 stars

Our own black dog--her name is Lulu, not Sally--is luckily not going to Heaven this week.  But when she does, I'm glad to have another book to read to my kids to make that lesson a little less painful.

I've reviewed three other Sally books (there are more)--Sally Gets a Job, Sally's Great Balloon Adventure, and Sally Goes to the Vet--and explained how much I like the very simple, very straightforward yet still very unique woodcut illustrations in the books. And I like Sally a whole lot!  How sad but appropriate that after these adventures and life experiences, she dies.  And goes to Heaven.

The first few pages of the book are about how difficult it is for Sally to eat and move. And then, the next morning, "Sally wakes up in heaven." And the joy begins!  She runs in circles really fast, without any sort of pain. There's a gigantic mound of smelly socks for her to sniff like crazy--hurray! All the animals play together; no one is afraid of anyone else. Meatballs grow on bushes and there are ice cream stands--for dogs!--on every block. Frisbees fill the sky!

Sally just wishes she could comfort her family and friends and let them know that all is good, her pain is gone, and that she is happy.

This is a very sweet book about a very sad time in the life of a family, but Huneck focuses the pet death experience about the dog and the wonderful things she's doing in Heaven. It's a "good to know about" book for when you need it.

(Another book very similar to this book you might also want to know about: Dog Heaven by Cynthia Rylant...)

The Roller Coaster Kid by Mary Ann Rodman

The Roller Coaster Kid by Mary Ann Rodman, illustrated by Roger Roth

Rating: 4.5 stars

Confession: I checked out this book from the library for the sole purpose of reviewing it here and attaching a video from Ben's first roller coaster ride from this past summer.  Sometimes a book leads to a story in our house; every so often a story leads to a book.  I think that's normal, right?

My plan went awry when I actually read the book for the first time--out loud, to all three kids, and barely made it through without sobbing.

Okay, let me back up.

This past summer I took my trio to Erie, Pennsylvania, where both my parents were born and raised.  We had a family-filled few days that were also sprinkled with a surprising amount of fun, including a trip to Waldameer.  I had once heard that if you want roller coaster riders as middle grade and older kids, you've got to start them young.  So, building upon the pint-sized success of a rinky-dink county fair roller coaster, they were willing to try a small roller coaster--small, but the real deal.

Brave Lorelei sat in the front seat, alone!  (I had told her this was the best, the most thrilling seat, so she wanted no other seat.  Atta girl!)  Ben and I sat behind her.  Like a normal 21st century mother, I whipped out my smartphone and took a video of his face for the first of two short laps around the track.  You can see his on-the-fence-ness, his uncertainty, his fear, and then...finally...his delight!  It's really cute.

So, to show off this video, I got this book from the library, The Roller Coaster Kid.

The book starts off innocently: Zach's grandfather earned the moniker "The Roller Coaster Kid" when he was a boy by riding the Whipper 100 times in a row.  Zach is impressed but afraid to ride it.  Every summer when he visits his grandparents in Oceanside, they do lots of fun things, including going to the park where the Whipper is still up and running.  Every summer Zach thinks he's brave enough, but as soon as he sees it, he decides next year, and he and Grandma go ride the Ferris Wheel.

"When the time is right, you'll face your fear," Grandma says.

She tells him the same thing I told Ben: "When the time is right, you'll face your fear."

Turn the page, read these words:

"Next summer comes, but everything's different.  Grandma's gone.  Forever."

I just about choked on whatever random lunch I was eating with the kids.  What?!  I hadn't expected this!  Tears immediately came to my eyes, and I tried to choke them back, barely successful.  Lorelei asked if I was okay, and I had to lie.  I'm usually pretty honest with them, but I couldn't this time.  If I had said, "I'm brought-to-my-knees saddened by the very thought of losing my mother--your one and only Grammy."

Grammy is, blessedly, healthy and strong, fit and capable--more than most 60-something year olds.  My kids think everyone dies when they're about 100, so they don't think about and don't need to think about their beloved Grammy dying sooner!  My tears were irrational, but real.  She is just such a big part of my life that very thought of losing her makes me incredibly sad.

I really need to read books first before I read them out loud.  Haven't I learned this by now?!

Counseled by his parents, Zach doesn't bring up his own sadness. He chokes it back instead.  He tries to cheer up his clearly sad Grandpa, and he finally decides that a ride on the Whipper will do the trick.  So he does it.  With Grandpa beside him.  He has fun, but when they step off, Grandpa is still his new blue self.

Until Zach blurts out loud, "I miss Grandma.  She'd have said I was brave.  For riding the Whipper.  For facing my fears."

Those are the words that get to his grandfather, the one that helps snap him back to reality a little bit.

I love that the courage Zach shows in showing his emotions, and telling Grandpa his honest feelings is bigger than the courage he shows in riding that roller coaster.  We so often applaud one sort of bravery but not the other, especially in boys.

And I will go back to appreciating my mom, my kids' Grammy, even more; my trio and I will do the Lucky Me dance because we don't have to miss her.

Dog Heaven by Cynthia Rylant

Dog Heaven by Cynthia Rylant

Rating: 5 very sweet, very sad stars

This morning a friend of mine and her son came over for a playdate.  Our sons--her first and my third--are about six months apart and play together well.  More importantly, I really like her.  She's wonderfully grounded in the Real Things That Matter, more sure of herself than I ever will be, and a big reader of both children's and adult books.

Plus, she's a dog lover.  In fact, two weeks ago Kiefer and I went to her house to play, and we had the privilege of meeting their family Golden Retriever.  Goldens, in case you didn't know, are the most lovable of all dogs; we had one growing up. My friend's Golden and my childhood Golden both had big goofy grins and big tail wags.  They were sweet, friendly, and looking to give love to and receive love in every set of hands their noses touched.

So I was saddened, to put it lightly, to hear that a few days after we met him, their ten year old Golden simply collapsed during a simple walk in their woodsy backyard.  The next day, she got a call from the vet that every dog lover/owner dreads.  He was gone.  There was no advanced warning, no time to prepare her son, no thought given to hiding away little remembrances of a great dog.  Their family dog--furry playmate, welcome-homer, late night companion--is gone.  I am sad for their family.

I've seen Dog Heaven at the library before, but had no reason to check it out.  Today when I saw it up on display, I grabbed it.  It was a sign, and I believe in signs.

Rather than focus on the inevitable sadness, Cynthia Rylant (an author to remember) focuses on the happy: where dogs go once they leave their Earthly homes.

They will be there when old friends show up.
They will be there at the door.

It is definitely a little religious--in my opinion, in a good, open-armed sort of way--but I love it.  I LOVE it.  It is one of those smile-through-the-tears sort of books.  I really want to type out the whole book here, but here are a few of my favorite passages:

When a dog first arrives in Heaven, he just runs. Dog Heaven has clear, wide lakes filled with geese who honk and flap and tease.  The dogs love this. 

And, oh, the dog biscuits.  Biscuits and biscuits as far as the eye can see.  God has a sense of humor, so He makes His biscuits in funny shapes for His dogs.  There are kitty-cat biscuits and squirrel biscuits.  Ice-cream biscuits and ham-sandwich biscuits.  Every angel who passes by has a biscuit for a dog. 

Every dog becomes a good dog in Dog Heaven.

This is a good book to know about, and to remember.  Because if you're reading this and you're a dog lover and you've got kids, you might need this book.  Actually, this book is proof that children's books are for all ages.  It is a fantastic book to remember even for those tough-seeming but actually tender grown ups whose hearts are going to break when their beloved pup passes away.  Imagining your great dog chasing geese in heaven, getting biscuits in heaven, and hearing that he is, finally (for my dogs) a good dog....it might help put a small smile on your face.

Good dog, Paddington.  Your people miss you greatly.